Ophelia Syndrome

There are times, situations and relationships in which you find yourself helplessly dependent on someone dictating what you should do, than thinking and deciding yourself.

The “Ophelia Syndrome” describes a person being too dependent on another, who simply tells you what to do, and you can't quite break free off.

Patients, especially in India, are often prone to it. Overwhelmed by the trauma of illness, ordeal of hospital visits, plummeting family support and strained pockets, they often give in submissively to what the doctor dictates, best described in their words, “doc, do whatever you think is best”.

To understand the syndrome, it is worthwhile delving into Hamlet, the Shakespearean tragedy in which Ophelia is the crazy girl in love with the hero, but being insecure and confused, lives by the dictates of her dominating father, Polonius, and goes on to base her feelings and opinions on his. Shakespeare masterly summarizes the relationship in 2 lines when Ophelia says,“I do not know, my lord, what I should think,” and, Polonius responds by, “I’ll teach you. Think yourself a baby.”

Doctors have traditionally played Polonius, and patients have donned the role of Ophelia, due to insecurity, confusion and dependency, in this 2-way relationship.

There is a more organic basis to this syndrome as well. Described in his own teenaged daughter, Dr Carr reported how she had become depressed, forgetful, confused and weak for months preceding the diagnosis of Hodgkin’s lymphoma, and how she had regained her mental functions, especially memory, after successful treatment.

In milder forms, Ophelia Syndrome is seen commonly in students. I must confess suffering from it myself.

In this condition the student is made to think, feel and decide what his teachers, parents or peers want him to, and he unknowingly accepts and follows.

Polonius-ization of thought is best demonstrated in the dates and events taught and memorized in history, or the names and attachments of muscles, nerves and bones that he learns by rote. The approval that he seeks and gets is what has already been defined, and he has to toil towards getting it by adherence and obedience. There is no scope for free thinking or exploring in this defined system.

The system also defines how he ought to feel when the results come in. The scales and responses are pre-set. If he brings in more than 90% that has been benchmarked “good”, he can stake claim to happiness (provided of course that there are not too many in that school batch who have also got that much, and perhaps more!).

Our career paths often follow the same route, as do our lives. When asked “What do YOU really think?” Ophelia had had none of her own.

This confused young woman who had not dared to think and feel for herself, finally ends her life in the play.

As published in HT City ( Hindustan Times) dated 31 March, 2013.